But why is all the milk gone?

As some of you may be aware, the Creamery has been running out of milk as of late. Basically we start running out around 7 pm and usually by 9ish we are cleaned out completely. Even though we recently raised our milk prices (yes, I know, we are no longer doing the 3 gallons for $5, it has been very traumatic for all of us), we still have the cheapest price in town and still sell milk like nobody's business. This fact put the Creamery mangers in kind of a pickle, because in order to cater to this immense demand on milk, they have to order TONS of it. But, we only have a tiny cooler to put it in, so to fit all that milk in there they have to stack it 7 or 8 crates high (each crate holds 4 gallons of milk). So just for a little reference point, I stand just shorter of 6 crates of milk, so if they are stacked 6 high I can get the milk out just fine. But anything higher than 6 crates becomes a danger to my existence. I can't reach 7 high, so I have to pull down a crate of 4 gallons of milk from above my head. Keep in mind that each gallon of milk is about 9 pounds, so that is about 36 pounds I am pulling down on top of my head. When they are stacked 8 high, not only do I have to pull 36 pounds of milk down, I have to do it precariously perching on some shotty stool. Needless to say, it can get pretty hairy back there in the milk cooler when they order so much milk. So because of all the complaints and fear of losing lives in the milk cooler, the Creamery cut back on its orders. Long story short, that is why we never have enough milk, so we don't have to risk our lives stocking milk anymore.

Ok ok, so you're all wondering what the point of that was. Well, I'll tell you. The point is, we now never have enough milk and by the time evening rolls around, we are completely out of milk. This does not, in any way, sit well with our faithful Creamery customers. Some are civil about it and simply ask when we will be getting more milk, but most are not so nice. People come storming up to the registers, all in a huff, and demand to know why we are out of milk and why this has happened to them the last 3 times and what they are supposed to do about their children's breakfast tomorrow. People seriously act as if we are the only store in Utah Valley that sells milk. They come up demanding milk and its just like, uh, maybe go to any of the many other grocery stores in the area? Did you happen to think of that? We also get the "I drove ALL the way from JUST to buy your milk, how can you not have any???" As if we are going to be like "Oh! you drove allll that way?? Well in that case, of course we have milk! Let me go get you some from our secret stash." People do think we have some hidden away somewhere sometimes though. One time a girl came up to me at the register and said "I just wanted some milk please." as if I could go fetch her some from some magical place in the Creamery. I just looked at her and told her we were really were out, that's why the cooler is empty. But I had the best reaction to the milk being gone this last Wednesday night.

It was 10:55, we were just about to close, and I was in the back putting bakery trays away. As I am doing this, a tall, angry freshman boy comes up to the door and asks, rather rudely, "Are you seriously out of milk??" This was even more annoying because we had signs up on the cooler doors that literally said Yes, we are really out of milk. So he obviously knows the answer to his snotty question, so I responded and said "Yeah, didn't you read the sign?" to which he yelled, "HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN IN AMERICA??? I MEAN, WHAT IS THIS, SOVIET RUSSIA????" and then he stormed off. David and I were both in the back for that whole outburst, and we just started and cracking up. Soviet Russia? Who even says that? Did I just miss the fact that the Cold War is apparently still going on? Is the Red Scare still a thing? Because I was not aware that Soviet Russia still existed, or that people still referred to it when venting their frustration about a store's lack of milk. So that bratty little freshman takes the cake when it comes to ridiculous reactions to the milk being gone. As annoying as it is to deal with all the questions and frustration, I guess running out of milk does make for some good stories, and for that, we thank you, angry/confused/disappointed/hysterical customers.

Parking Debacle

Now I know it really has been a horrendously long time since my last post, and for that I am very sorry. It just seems that as I hit my two years at the Creamery mark this month, less and less that happens at the Creams surprises me or seems blog worthy. But as I worked my customary 4 to 8 pm grocery shift today, I found myself thinking, I should blog today. And gosh darn it I am going to. So here goes, my first Creamery post of the last year of our lives.

As some of you may or may not know/care, BYU has decided to start tearing down Heritage Halls this semester. Why they are doing it now instead of during the summer is information that is a much higher pay grade than my own, so I guess it will forever remain a mystery. But in any case, the Halls are being torn down and as a consequence the north parking lot of the Creamery is entirely fenced off. This has caused quite a bit of friction with our Creamery regulars, as they cannot seem to find anywhere else to park. Our south lot is really small and can't accommodate all the people we get on our usually busy evenings, so people are left looking for a place to park while they raid our store of all out milk and ice cream. They are justifiably annoyed at the situation, but they are unjustifiably con-fuddled about where they should park, because, not even 10 yards away, lies a massive parking lot. And I mean massive. It is huge, and is just across the street from the Creamery. It is a stones throw away literally, granted the thrower of this stone isn't a small child or a wuss. So because people can't seem to see this parking lot, or don't consider it an acceptable place to park, they come into the store and gripe and moan about how they fenced off that lot, and ask obnoxious questions like "Why have they put all those fences up? Where are we supposed to park? What are we supposed to do? How will our lives go without convenient parking at the Creamery?? TELL US NOW! SOLVE MY PROBLEMS FOR ME, PLEASE!" It is hard for me not to be rude about it and just be like, "See that GIANT parking lot, just across the street? yeah, that's where you park you half wits." Instead I just give them my fake sympathy smile and tell them how annoying I know it is and apologize profusely and then kindly direct them to the other lot. Usually they are like Oh! I didn't know I could park there! My parking problems are solved forever! Thanks kind Creamery cashier, you have really saved the day! But today, I had a woman come through and when I told her to park over in the other lot she said "Yeah but it is just so hard to carry my groceries across the street, especially all this milk. It is just really inconvenient." I said I was sorry and she walked away, but I mean come on, really? Have we gotten so lazy that walking across the street is really that much of a burden? And just because she, among many others, feels the need to buy ridiculous amounts of milk doesn't mean that she gets to complain about carrying them. I told her she could use a cart, as long as she brought it back, but she didn't seems to like the idea of walking an empty cart ALL the way back across the street. That would just be such a chore. So, until the construction is done (which, knowing BYU, could go on indefinitely) customers will have to face some very pressing trials and we at the Cream will have to put up with their whining about it. Man, I love this place, I don't know why I ever wanted to leave.

snide, sarcastic SOB

This story deserves its own post because oh man, is it a doozy. Let's just say, that the fellow in this story is definitely the rudest that I have dealt with yet. Oh yeah, he is one of those kinds of people. Alright so let me set this up for you. Katie, my co-worker, has a man come through her line and asks if he can use a check. She informs him of our policy, which is that we do not accept checks EVER, under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES without a photo ID (the capitalization will become clear in a moment, no need to fret) He proceeds to tell her that he wants to speak to a manager about this, so he calls the manager up front for him. Nicole was the store manager at the time, so she comes up to see what is going on. Katie points her in his direction and this is where I become aware of what is going on, because they are standing all of 3 feet away from me and I can hear them very clearly. He goes on to give her this bull about how he wants to use a check, and the total is ONLY $2.50, but he doesn't have ID, so she should just let it slide, because I mean come one, it is ONLY $2.50. She very politely informs him that our policy is that we need ID and that we will unfortunately not be able to help him. He gets very snooty at this point and begins going on and on and on and ooon about how the total is only $2.50 and that she should just make an exception for him because he would have to drive all the way home to get his wallet and his wife sent him here for this stuff and it will just take forever. Nicole, again, tells him that we can't change the policy and he starts to get sassy. He starts asking "Oh, do you not trust me? Do you really think that I am going to steal this or something, I mean come one, it is TWO FIFTY, you can't just let it go? What? You think the check will bounce? I will give you my phone number, look, I even have a piece of mail here, is that really not enough?" (who the heck carries around mail with them and not their wallet anyways?) His tone was so unbelievably condescending and I was holding back the venomous lashings of my tongue with every word he spoke. Poor Nicole was just being berated but to her credit she stood strong and did not budge on the policy for him. He then got even more sarcastic and rude and began asking if there was a senior manager there, and when she said no, I'm the manager, he was like no, isn't there a senior manager. (all the italics really show how much of a stuck up snot this guy was) And she again told him no, I am the manager. He then went on to whine about driving all the way home, and proceeded to spout off this little gem, "Oh, so making me drive all the way back home is less important to you than keeping to your policy?" And then Nicole said the best thing ever, "Yes, it is." HA! It was glorious. But as if that was not clear enough, he had to be all snide about it and say, "Well, I guess the customer isn't always right." And as he was about to lay into Nicole all over again, I turned around to shut him up. I had had about as much as I could handle. I looked him right in the face and asked, "Why would you come to the grocery store without your wallet sir?" And to his credit, he did not miss a beat and looked right back at me and said, "Well I wish I wash a better man." But I came right back with, "Well, I wish we could budge on our policy, but we can't, and that's that." And turned back around. Oh man that shut him up and he left. But that is not even the end of the story! It gets even better folks. So after this happened and I finished taking care of my line, I picked up the baskets under my register to go put them away and to talk to my other co-worker Gabby, who had not heard all of this go down. So I go to her register and am about to give her the deets when HE comes walking up and points and me and very angrily says "What? You aren't open over there any more??" I was confused because, seeing as I was not at my register, that would be a pretty good indicator off the line NOT being open, and because I did not expect to see him so soon (it had literally been like 5 minutes) Just told him "No." He started to get really pissed and started going off about driving all the way home when I cut him short and said that both of the other registers were open and ready to help him(he was really just pissed because he wanted to make me help him to get me back for mouthing off to him but I didn't let him have that either). He shut up again and went through Gabby's line. I left because I wanted to punch him and couldn't stand to look at him anymore. So I went back to Katie's register, which he was right in front of, and she had not realized that he had come back, and was very loudly talking about how he shouldn't have been driving without a license anyways. I motioned for her to be quiet and pointed to him and she just stopped talking. I had to hold in my hysterical laughter at that jerk totally getting humiliated, because there is no way he didn't hear her. After the transaction was done, he turned around and with a slimy smile asked, "And what is your name?" I looked him right in the face and told him my name with a smile "And, what that manager's name?" I told him her's as well, and with a sarcastic thanks, he left. He just had to feel like he has won or something by asking my name, like I was in any way intimidated by such a spineless creep. I told that story about ten times that night alone and it still makes me angry just to think about that obnoxious man. I mean he lived in Wymount! That is literally a 3 minute drive! And he caused all this fuss just because he didn't want to drive home to get his wallet. So morals of the story are, don't forget your wallet when you go to the store, when the manager tells you no it means NO, and don't talk down to grocery store employees because they wont take it for very long.

Prank Calls and Flash Mobs

I know it has been an eternity again, but I guess that is kind of an underlying theme of this blog. Also, after working so long in a grocery store, things tend to get less and less noteworthy and everything starts turning into a blur of monotonous scanner sounds....Lets hope I'm not to that point just yet. But within the last few months I had my first prank call AND my first flash mob. Seeing as the Creamery is located right in the freshman dorms, I would expect more of this kind of behavior. Unfortunately, I do not have much to tell from the prank call. The sound was all muffled because the kid was on speaker and all I could hear was laughing whenever he said something. I was quite distraught that I was unable to hear what was so funny. I'm sure it was unbelievably clever, whatever it was. But I do have a much better tale for this flash mob. So it is a day like any other at the good ole Creamery on Ninth, and as I am sitting at my register bored out of my mind, I take a glance down the produce/cereal isle and see this girl holding a red cabbage up to her face like she is smelling it. Completely intrigued by this, I tell my co-worker Katie to look and we both sneakily stare at this girl, trying to figure out what she is up to. Then I reluctantly turn my attention from the cabbage path girl over there to the customers that are in my line trying to talk to me, and the guy laughs and says "Looks like you guys have got a flash mob." Still thinking about how weird that girl is and not really paying attention to him, I look up and ask him what he is talking about. He points down that same isle and I realize that everyone (including cabbage girl!) is frozen. There were about 10 or 15 youngins doing the whole flash mob thing, frozen in various shopping positions. I was just too caught up in that girl sniffin' on cabbage to realize.

Education Week / BYU is not a holy land

Hello all! Yes, yes I know its been so long since I've blogged and you've all just been dying to hear from me. Well it seems that today is your lucky day. Alright so, Education Week. It happened back in August and was probably one of my least favorite times of the year to work at the Creamery. Not because it was overly crowded, or that it was super busy, or that the hours were bad. Oh those things were just fine. Its the attitude of half the people that come to Education Week that makes me crazy. You see, I am not a fan of this "BYU is a holy land" mentality that people have. I mean come on people, it is just a school. Yes it's a great school with great values etc etc etc. But it is not some blessed ground. Its not. Even though it is treated as such, it is not a "Mormon Mecca". Yet people continue, year after year, to make "pilgrimages" here, to ship their kids off here for the summers, and instill in their young ones an obsessive love for BYU. Let me reiterate that I do think BYU is a wonderful school with amazing things to offer, but it is still just that, a school. And this belief that BYU is hallowed ground transfers over to the Creamery. I've referenced this before, but people really are obsessed with the BYU made stuff we sell. I have heard the words "Oh I swear by BYU (insert ice cream, ranch, cheese, cottage cheese here) " It is nothing to swear by people. It is just dairy products, made like any other dairy products, being sold in a grocery store just like any other. The Education Weekers just exemplify this obnoxious behavior. They all flock to the Creamery and fawn over EVERYTHING. "Oh look they have Creamery buckets! I HAVE to get one!" "This ice cream is better than life itself!" "I have to stock up and buy 8 gallons of ranch while I'm here, it is the best" Every little thing becomes just magical, just because it is in a grocery store that is on BYU campus. And dealing with flocks of wannabe middle aged "students" obsesssing over everything ain't really my thing. Because tempers can get pretty out of control. Like just the other day, this woman asked me if I could check if we had more buttermilk in the back, and when we didn't she flipped out because she drove ALL the way from Salt Lake through I-15 traffic just for our buttermilk. To that I have two things to say: first, if you are going to drive more that 20 minutes to get something from a grocery store, you're an idiot if you don't call ahead and make sure they have it because contrary to popular belief we do not have infinite supplies of everything. And second, don't drive 30 minutes plus for some freaking buttermilk. Holy cow (pun?). Just buy buttermilk where you live because I can guarantee that it is no different than ours. It was hard for me not to just tell her she was an idiot for driving so far and I had absolutely no sympathy for her and she could gripe at me all she wanted because I could care less. But of course I cannot say such things. Which brings us to the very common theme of Kylie wishing she could tell people off at work when they deserved it. Hmpf.

more efy, busing and customer shenanigans

So its been a while again, I know. But since my last post, I have picked up a shift in the grill busing! Woo hoo! Even more stories about people and their weird/rude/annoying habits! So lets just start with the busing stories. Lets see. Oh well just the other day, I was going about my usual busing duties, a family came in toting an adorable little puppy. I'm not sure what it was, looked like some kind of spaniel mix or something, but regardless it was cute. So I continued doing what I was doing, and at one point I peaked over at their table, and I saw the mom holding the puppy on her right leg under the table, while looking over to her left at something, meanwhile her maybe 7 year old son had his ice cream cone also under the table and was letting the puppy go to town on it, while he was tentatively licking the other side at the same time. So basically what I see is a puppy and a little boy secretly sharing an ice cream cone. It just struck me particularly hilarious. Haha and when I came back, the boy had the ice cream cone all to himself again and had about finished it off. Which is, needless to say, pretty gross. I could tell a million little stories about my major pet peeve of busing, but I'll just sum it up real quick: people leaving ALL their crap on the table. They don't pick up a thing. It is so aggravating. And then sometimes people just leave and I cant tell if they still want their food or if they are just leaving it or what. So sometimes I just leave it there, just to be sure I dont throw someone's food away. But this leads to more people getting pissed at me and telling me to clean tables for them. Ugh this one lady in particular called me from the back where I was doing dishes. From the moment I laid eyes on her I knew she was going to be a pain. She was probably about 45, and was sporting a zebra skirt with leggings from a store that I probably shop at, with a pale green t-shirt and, here's the winner, a matching green fedora hat. And she was obscenely tan. Not my kind of woman. And all my pre-judgments based on her appearance were correct. She talked to me like I was her house keeper when she very impolitely asked me to clean her table, while her two rambunctious little girls bounced around and watched me. I'm sure glad their mother is setting the wonderful example of treating other people like they are of a lower race than they are. She almost forgot a thank you until my back was turned and I was walking away. I just kind of laughed to myself and kept walking. Oh and the EFY kids are not any more pleasurable that they are in the grocery section. They are definitely worse on this side of the store. They all cram into the ice cream line and chatter incessantly about mundane, immature things like the boys across the way or how their hair is looking or how much money their parents gave them to spend on absolute crap. And there are so many of them that I have to shove my way through them. And they conveniently are always standing right where I need to be. And the phrase excuse me either doesn't exist to them or they are just deaf to people who aren't immature little brats like themselves. So EFY is no better on the grill side of things. Back to my personal favorite, grocery, I have been having so much fun (sarcasm heavily implied here) with the new freshman. They are just about as annoying as the EFY kids. But they are a little more fun to observe because you can pick 'em out so quick due to their obvious nervousness and/or overly bold behavior. There is one freshman, however, that I cannot stand. And I seem to see him every single time I work grocery. I had my first run in with him earlier this week I think, maybe last week. So I'm sitting at my register and he comes up asking me where the food coloring is. I kindly take him down the right isle and point it out on the shelf. Expecting a thank you or at least something of that nature, I am utterly surprised when he turns to his friend and scoffs, "See, women are just better at finding things on shelves." It took every thing I had in me not to punch him in the face right there. I was more than ready to introduce his face to one of those shelves that I was so familiar with. Later that same day he came in with a cart saying that he'd found it by his dorm, so I pointed to the other carts and told him to put it there. He just looked at me and said, "No, but I found this alllll the way out by my dorm." I was more than short with him when I repeated that he should just put it with the others. I hope he felt my icy disdain. Ugh enough about that, today I had a run in with a gaggle of air head EFY girls. The kind of girls that give females a bad name. After being sufficiently giggly and ridiculous, one of the girls went to get her money, momentarily forgetting where it was, then smiling and pulling it out of her shirt. Yes, she had a 20 in her bra. Then she apologized for using a 20 on something so cheap. I just looked at her. In my mind I was like really? I'm sorry that I have to touch this money you just pulled out of your bra. Thats what I'm sorry about. And I'm sorry that you are trying to draw attention to your little A-cup chest. You'll soon learn not to want people to notice that you have no boobs. Almost all of my fake politeness was used up on that group, seeing as she almost forgot the one item she purchased as she left. I am also over people who think they are funny. We get people in there every day who say or do stupid things, mistakenly thinking that we want them to entertain us with their comedic prowess. We don't want that. We certainly don't want you to try and be funny by saying or doing awkward or strange things. But people seem to think this is the way to go, that is what the "cool" people do. Its not. This man came through the other day and as I was ringing him up he said he wanted a discount. I just smiled and mentally rolled my eyes as always, but stopped when he told me that President Monson said he should get a discount. Really? In my mind thats all I can think. Really? Is this guy serious? This is a serious place, we can be serious here. And I wanted to ask him if he was serious. I mean what am I supposed to say to that? Its not really funny. Its mostly just lame. I just laughed my super fake laugh and said something about how I can't say no to that. Except I am going to say no to that. I guess he did that to someone else on campus, and I am envious of their response, which was, "Oh well I'll just give you the same discount as Pres. Monson." when he asked what that discount was, the person responded, "Oh, Pres. Monson would never ask for a discount." Ha I just think that is so clever. Too bad I'm not that quick. Too bad I didn't get to talk to this super cranky guy today who told one of the managers, (and I quote) "Well, I've spent my whole life trying to stay away from BYU, but now I'm here, and I want some ice cream, so where can I get some?" I guess he was scowling and unpleasant the entire conversation, and he even came through my line, but didn't say anything as charming as that. If he had, I would've been all to tempted for thank him for his donation to the Lord's university, or something ridiculous like that. Ah well. Maybe next time. And now it is time for bed. Goodnight all.

addendum to EFY

so I forgot a crucial EFY story. My first day with the kids, These boys came through and their total was $1.69. One of the boys turned to the other and said "Hey, guys look, 69. ha ha" Then they proceeded to high five one another and laugh at how funny the number 69 is. I guess I've never been a teenage boy, so I was less than impressed. Mostly it was just funny because as far as EFY boys go, its the number 69 in any context = much high fiving. and thats all I needed to add. In this addendum.